Development

Officially it has started! I didn't think it would happen so soon...
I'm 23 weeks along. Just a few more days and I'll be in the third trimester. However, to those who do not know me, I just look big-bellied. I look like I've been working my way solo, through a keg and it is moving from the metal tin to my gut. I do not look pregnant. I look nothing like all the photos of pregnant women with distinct round bulges. Yes, I know, I should count myself lucky

However, when I am not counting myself lucky for having a beach-ball under my shirt, I am stuck with this nagging thought in my head, "Is my fetus developing normally?" Is it on the small side? Is that why my belly isn't round and massive? I didn't think I'd have to worry about my child's development until the Human Tape Worm (HTW) made an appearance. At which point, I'd feel compelled to chronicle how soon it walked, held a rattle, said "Mommy!" and such. But no, I'm starting the worry now even before the HTW has appeared.

Maybe it would grow more if I felt more maternal towards it. The exercise tapes and birth class talk about feeling connected to my baby. How am I supposed to feel connected? The big belly is like a never-ending post Thanksgiving bloat and the kicks could just be high-powered gas. The glowing woman, hands on belly, gently gazing down who is somehow channeling the Virgin Mary - nope not me. I'm sure it will change with HTW makes a personal appearance. Until then, I'll keep wondering what is going on in there and if it has learned how to play Mozart yet.